Saturday, September 5, 2009

Back to school fashion trends

Hello you fierce little firecrackers you, the names Old Greybeard the resident fashion expert/homeless man-- been wandering these parts since, oh musta been back in '66--been staying on top 'a the fashion world ever since, not much to do as a vagbond sides look at passerbys, begging for change as they pretend not to hear my solemn cries of help. THAT AND SUCKING DICK FOR A NICE PAIR OF PRADA HEELS!!!!So I knows ma fashion like I knows sleeping on a bench in the winter time-- SOMETHING FIERCE.

So who better to tell all you little sluts about the hottest fall fashion trends from the streets of Milan, Paris and the University of Calgary, than a man who's slept on them very streets?

It wouldn't take a fashion expert to tell you that the hottest thing coming off the New York Fashion show right now (BESIDES TWIGHLIGHT GUY! SO HOT!) is pink wigs as seen on the head of SU commander and chief (GIRL, I TOLD YOU, I JUST KNOW FASHION LOLOLOLOL) Kat Lord. Look how that vibrant neon pink wig just captures the hell out of attention! She'll break a lot of hearts with that wig thats for sure! SHE'LL ALSO BREAK A LOT OF CHAIRS WITH THAT ASS A HERS! GIRL!!!! YOU KNOW I AM JUST JOKING WITH YOU GIRL! See that's the beauty of that pink wig, it accentuates the top of her beautiful head and her personality to remind people that she's more than just a sexy murloc. Pink Wigs $24.

Business Casual Cowboy
My motto is walk like its for sale and the rent is due tonight but DA-YAM! John Santos is seen here rocking shorts, a polo tee, sandles, and a cowboy hat. This is fall fashion at its highest peak. I don't know how John does it! Be like John and think casual but business like and then throw a cowboy hat on top of it. The white polo tee just screams professionalism and raw passion for business while the shorts and sandals say that this man of mystery has got a little secret. Nothing is hotter in Calgary than wearing a cowboy hat, so why restrict yourself to only a few weeks a year? Gays and Native americans have known this fashion secret for years!

Straight outta the Fairybook
OMFGG! Luke Valentine has done it again! Taking inspiration from his second fave "fairy tail", Luke brilliantly takes on the personification of little red riding hood. This is fashion 101, take something old like an old disney movie or some ish, and make it new. TIP. Look at how he just seemlessly incorporates little accessories like that redhead band that sits just below his little Gayhawk. Add a picnic basket clutch for class, and you know that Yogi wouldn't be the only bear sniffing around his bushes! Speaking about BOOBOO's!!!!! OMFGG what is with that little slut in his seafoam tee? Girlfriend, The make-up artist is your last front to the world, so you never want to piss them off, because they'll mess you up. And honey, you got merked the ish up by ESTABAN.

Old Greybeard Out.

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