Thursday, April 16, 2009

The Resident Gay Vagabond Fashionista

Hello all you fierce little University students you. The names Old Greybeard, been part of this school since it was first founded back in '66, was a student then, got my degree in oh musta been '71, never left just fallen on some hard times is all, been here a long time, about as long as the penis I saw from the bushes this morning, numnumnum ethnic cock. Scandalous! By the way before I forget, hunny if you ever need that curry flavor thing sucked, I'd do it for a can of beans. LOL! Who am I kidding, I'd go down on a stud like you for free.

I've been hired to be the new fashion columnist at The Gontlit. A lot of you little fierce skanks in your shirtskirts and belts are probably wondering what a man of my ilk, the homeless kind, could possibly know about fashion. Bitch please. First of all LOL! shirtskirts what are you too poor to buy pants? Been there done that. Also clean that M.A.C makeup off your slut face, god, everyone from this side of Paris knows that it's all about L'oreal right now, and second bitch, when you've lived on the streets of Milan, you just know things about fashion. Obligatory sassy head shake.

Erin McDougal's casual SARS Pirate look:

Look at this little firecracker here, OMG what is she thinking? SARS was so 2006, and that T? Girl that's a bargain bin piece of shit. Johnny Depp called he wants that bandanna back. I got news for you. You look more homeless then me, and girl, I'm homeless. Thank god she was just going to school in this trainwreck of an outfit, and not on the runway. Overall I give it 2 cans of beans out of 5.

Luke Valentine is Grandma Chic:

How does this guy do it? Day after day he explodes onto the fashion scene and just when you thought he was out of fashion he pulls something like this out of the gaymaker (closet). I never knew my grandma, she died in world war 1, but if I ever knew her I wish she'd look as hot as this. Notice the broach? It's little detail like that, which makes you look gayer than cum on a mustache. Fabulous.

Resident Badboy Farouq Maherali bringing back Saturday Night Fever:

That's the guy I saw peeing in the bushes! And I thought he was looking fine with that little deer caught in the headlights look when I said, "need me to hold that?". Farouq is always on top of his game, but look at that little ho on his arm, ho alert. Ho what are you doing on my man's shoulder? I'd piss in your purse if it wasn't some Sears piece of shit. Farouq is what we call in the homeless biz, hot garbage.

Old Greybeard out.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

haha, I saw the grandma guy at BSD with gold pants.