Back to school fashion trends

Hello you fierce little firecrackers you, the names Old Greybeard the resident fashion expert/homeless man-- been wandering these parts since, oh musta been back in '66--been staying on top 'a the fashion world ever since, not much to do as a vagbond sides look at passerbys, begging for change as they pretend not to hear my solemn cries of help. THAT AND SUCKING DICK FOR A NICE PAIR OF PRADA HEELS!!!!So I knows ma fashion like I knows sleeping on a bench in the winter time-- SOMETHING FIERCE.

So who better to tell all you little sluts about the hottest fall fashion trends from the streets of Milan, Paris and the University of Calgary, than a man who's slept on them very streets?

PINK WIGS!
It wouldn't take a fashion expert to tell you that the hottest thing coming off the New York Fashion show right now (BESIDES TWIGHLIGHT GUY! SO HOT!) is pink wigs as seen on the head of SU commander and chief (GIRL, I TOLD YOU, I JUST KNOW FASHION LOLOLOLOL) Kat Lord. Look how that vibrant neon pink wig just captures the hell out of attention! She'll break a lot of hearts with that wig thats for sure! SHE'LL ALSO BREAK A LOT OF CHAIRS WITH THAT ASS A HERS! GIRL!!!! YOU KNOW I AM JUST JOKING WITH YOU GIRL! See that's the beauty of that pink wig, it accentuates the top of her beautiful head and her personality to remind people that she's more than just a sexy murloc. Pink Wigs $24.

Business Casual Cowboy
My motto is walk like its for sale and the rent is due tonight but DA-YAM! John Santos is seen here rocking shorts, a polo tee, sandles, and a cowboy hat. This is fall fashion at its highest peak. I don't know how John does it! Be like John and think casual but business like and then throw a cowboy hat on top of it. The white polo tee just screams professionalism and raw passion for business while the shorts and sandals say that this man of mystery has got a little secret. Nothing is hotter in Calgary than wearing a cowboy hat, so why restrict yourself to only a few weeks a year? Gays and Native americans have known this fashion secret for years!


Straight outta the Fairybook
OMFGG! Luke Valentine has done it again! Taking inspiration from his second fave "fairy tail", Luke brilliantly takes on the personification of little red riding hood. This is fashion 101, take something old like an old disney movie or some ish, and make it new. TIP. Look at how he just seemlessly incorporates little accessories like that redhead band that sits just below his little Gayhawk. Add a picnic basket clutch for class, and you know that Yogi wouldn't be the only bear sniffing around his bushes! Speaking about BOOBOO's!!!!! OMFGG what is with that little slut in his seafoam tee? Girlfriend, The make-up artist is your last front to the world, so you never want to piss them off, because they'll mess you up. And honey, you got merked the ish up by ESTABAN.

Old Greybeard Out.

The Resident Gay Vagabond Fashionista

Hello all you fierce little University students you. The names Old Greybeard, been part of this school since it was first founded back in '66, was a student then, got my degree in oh musta been '71, never left just fallen on some hard times is all, been here a long time, about as long as the penis I saw from the bushes this morning, numnumnum ethnic cock. Scandalous! By the way before I forget, hunny if you ever need that curry flavor thing sucked, I'd do it for a can of beans. LOL! Who am I kidding, I'd go down on a stud like you for free.

I've been hired to be the new fashion columnist at The Gontlit. A lot of you little fierce skanks in your shirtskirts and belts are probably wondering what a man of my ilk, the homeless kind, could possibly know about fashion. Bitch please. First of all LOL! shirtskirts what are you too poor to buy pants? Been there done that. Also clean that M.A.C makeup off your slut face, god, everyone from this side of Paris knows that it's all about L'oreal right now, and second bitch, when you've lived on the streets of Milan, you just know things about fashion. Obligatory sassy head shake.

Erin McDougal's casual SARS Pirate look:

Look at this little firecracker here, OMG what is she thinking? SARS was so 2006, and that T? Girl that's a bargain bin piece of shit. Johnny Depp called he wants that bandanna back. I got news for you. You look more homeless then me, and girl, I'm homeless. Thank god she was just going to school in this trainwreck of an outfit, and not on the runway. Overall I give it 2 cans of beans out of 5.

Luke Valentine is Grandma Chic:

How does this guy do it? Day after day he explodes onto the fashion scene and just when you thought he was out of fashion he pulls something like this out of the gaymaker (closet). I never knew my grandma, she died in world war 1, but if I ever knew her I wish she'd look as hot as this. Notice the broach? It's little detail like that, which makes you look gayer than cum on a mustache. Fabulous.

Resident Badboy Farouq Maherali bringing back Saturday Night Fever:

That's the guy I saw peeing in the bushes! And I thought he was looking fine with that little deer caught in the headlights look when I said, "need me to hold that?". Farouq is always on top of his game, but look at that little ho on his arm, ho alert. Ho what are you doing on my man's shoulder? I'd piss in your purse if it wasn't some Sears piece of shit. Farouq is what we call in the homeless biz, hot garbage.


Old Greybeard out.